The following is a letter my grandmother wrote to my grandfather in December 1942. She was at home in Lichterfelde, Berlin, with 3 children, ages 6 - 13. Her husband was stationed somewhere in Hungary. To me this letter shows a glimpse of the worries, struggles, and loneliness she and most likely other women went through. My father was too young to be much of a help to her, indeed future letters show he is actually quite a pain, although he recognizes now that she must have suffered terribly.
I am named after my grandmother. I knew her when I was growing up, but not being able to speak German, I never really got to Know her. These letters make me proud to carry on her name.
Lichterfelde, December 13, 1942
My dearest, good Gustel,
The above date of this letter may have coincided with the date you will receive it. Hopefully it will reach you by then, otherwise you were certainly sad. I think so much of you, dearest, how would you like to spend Christmas Eve? By being together with your comrades and your men, you are not alone. And we really hope that from the trip, whether on vacation or on business, it doesn't matter what will happen and you can then leave on the 25th and we can have you here for a few days. I'm really looking forward to it and it is my most beautiful Christmas present. If only nothing intervenes. For you it is already the 3rd Christmas which you live away from us. I would like to wish you and all of us with all my heart that it is really the last one and that you can be with us again next year, and you, at least, will delight your family.
It is always in my power, but I want to make an effort to have my part in it. The children finally become more sensible, as it is usually the case that everyone is loved individually, only in the majority they do not get along. everyone is in a power struggle, and this makes life difficult for me and also for you. Now they are looking forward to the holidays that start on the 15th and of course Christmas. Dietie is very excited about the Christmas tree. He already pestered me very much that I should buy a tree. That happened secretly yesterday with the Irmel without his presence and he discovered it today.
Now he is questioning whether the little angel is bringing him gifts for the well-behaved children, because then he will not be allowed to get one, or from the moms who buy the gifts. The big kids try to talk him out of the nonsense and always think that I shouldn't tell him such nonsense anymore. But he was very happy when he discovered the tree on the balcony today. Incidentally, a very nice Douglass, bought from Brandenburg, in your honor, otherwise I had not purchased such a fine one.
By the way, the Hali was very cute at the Advent star. He had never seen the star turned on and said afterwards: “I like an idiot believed for years that an angel would bring the thing.” And now you think that you have to make the Dietz smart ahead of time. Only that with the small children is still unclear to them. Dietz has now come up with the very practical method of getting all the better things like sweets and meat from his brother that he can’t get from his mother. His practical side comes out again.
At lunchtime today, we ate a lot and injured half the bird with great comfort. He was wonderfully tender but didn't have much fat to skim off. In any case, we had a real gourmet meal and thought very much of the good donor. Just a shame that you couldn't be there, dearest. Well, if the announced beef does come, we will raise something for you. Kate was astonished that we made a dip, they probably only eat it with the fat, even without vegetable dishes.
Now I have to thank you very much for your letters of 7 and 8 and the gloves that fit very well, also for Irmel! It was really nice. We thought that you had forgotten it first, but I got mail from you again and could be happy. I'm also looking forward to the other one. And a package for Hali came yesterday with old bread. He was very happy about it and doesn't want to give anything to anyone. Dietje begs for some, and Hali says no. Another reason for the most beautiful noise in the house.
Hopefully your tooth history is now corrected without adding the tooth. You are terribly noble with a parquet machine, I haven't heard anything like that in our area of Berlin. And as a house commandant you are sure to make yourself unpopular with the host.
You write something about books from the front. But I don't know what people want. You'd better ask and tell us then.
Irmel mainly has history, geography, etc. reports from researchers, stories from the South Seas, no young lady lectures. Hali reads most Indian things, according to his age, of course, also very soldier stories and funny things. I can say without a doubt about myself. In addition to good novels, I also have a lot of things with a historical or scientific background (such as Schenzinger? Aniline, or metal). But you won't have time before the trip.
My little Christmas gift for you, Gustchen, is also a book that I liked so much that I read it first. "The Father" by Klepper is about the soldier king. I very much wish that you enjoy it. It was written as a novel, not a dry story. I wasn’t able to get it here. A friend’s husband brought me it from Kraków. The east is probably preferentially supplied with books. You just have to have relationships, otherwise you get nothing.
Recently I watched the Bismarck film, "Entlassung", which I really liked. Of course, quite a bit exaggerated, but that must be the case. On Friday I had coffee, Ursel and Annemarie, plus Eva. Liesel had canceled me again, she had no time to clean it up! But it was very nice and cozy and everyone said to say hello to you.
It is now rumored that the girls who finish high school must immediately become Blitzmaedel (War Women), and that middle school girls should also be drawn in before getting their Certificates. Only with the authorization can one prefer to do it later. Naturally, Eva had to report from her experience about this profession and was quite in her element.
I was very envied for my Kate and Eva compared very much to her sweet little Dutch girl. If the Kate will only stay for a long time! With the little ones, I need them even more.
Wilhelm K. is okay, he is still sick and may not have a visitor yet, but called me in the evening and had a nice greeting. For that, Hella has fallen again and is in bed. This time something is torn on the upper thigh. Walter doesn’t know if he comes to the festival. Until then, it should be fine again. He will probably leave on the 27th, evening or 28th, maybe you can still see him there. Ms. Czernak is hard to reach, works in ... again? Hella tries to speak with her, often tried in vain. She works in a Soldiers’ home as DRK helper with Ms. Simon.
Of course you have the pictures attached today, thanks to E.W., which she sent me at my request. Irmel looks like at least 16 years again. I'm fine, tomorrow or the day after tomorrow I'll go to Dr. ... and then I can get a ticket for preferred shopping, but unfortunately it takes 10-14 days due to deposits. And today you come in 14 days, hopefully, and I scream hooray. I only get to the train when the weather is good, otherwise I send the children, so that I don't get cold again. But I'm really looking forward to you. And Marlenchen is very quiet and is happy with me.
Hugs and kisses to you many times, my dear, and for Christmas even more than usual.
Your Lotte.
Photos - Top: Mutti (Charlotte Bauke), 1939
Bottom: Walter, Mutti, Dietz, Irmel, Christmas either 1942 or 1945